Steve Urkel: I'm more of a polka kinda guy. Steve Urkel: [dropping his bowling ball and hyperventilating]. Laura: How long have we known each other? Easy Eddo. Steven Quincy Urkel: Land sakes, woman. [Grabs and kisses her. I'll grab my stuff and I'll be out of here tomorrow. Stefan Urquelle. Steve Urkel: Uh-oh. I don't *ever* want to work for you again. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Who would've thought Harriette was a bit friendly. Judge Vance: All right, young man, call your first witness. I'm getting dizzy. Steve Urkel: I can't! Waldo Faldo: Why are ya gonna do that, Willie? Urkel, the camera was on Eddie the whole time. He acts like a gangster, gangsters hate cops. Laura: Ma, the package said to cook it at 275 for 20 minutes. Second question. Aunt Oona: The water main snapped when the roof collapsed. You would win the gold. Boyd broke my glasses. Richie Crawford: We're going to play with these toys for 30 days and return them, like Uncle Carl's going to do with his peanut helmet. Join. Steve Urkel: [Pointing to the floor] Him. Steve Urkel: I'll settle for a toenail clipping! Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: How could you mess this up? I feel stupid! Well, why didn't you tell me? Ms. Steuben: Uh, excuse us just a minute. Carl: Typical. So go ahead, FIRE ME! Let me tell you something though Weasel. [to Steve] I'm wearing you DOWN, baby! Laura: So, Myrtle, how long are you gonna be around? Addeddate 2019-09-04 04:56:23 Identifier steveurkel_201909 Scanner Internet Archive HTML5 Uploader 1.6.4. plus-circle Add Review. Steve Urkel: What? Steve Urkel: Come on everybody, let's ooh the durkel! Played by Jaleel White, Urkel joined "Family Matters" at the end of its first season, which one of his castmates says was a production decision that changed everything. So I walked in the library, sugar, I couldn't believe my eyes, there were THOUSANDS of books just sitting there waiting to be read. Carl Otis Winslow: Tomorrow. Anybody have more punch? Laura: I couldn't have done this without you. Harriette Winslow: What's the matter, not feeling well? Steve Urkel: Why, sure! Lt.Murtaugh: Do you know that woman Winslow? What bright side, Weasel? Waldo: Thanks for helping me find the gym. They help move along our sentences. You see, I use verbs. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Bright side? Carl Otis Winslow: Calm down, Harriette, you're overreacting. Dec 25, 2011 - Explore Nadia Hussein's board "Steve Urkel", followed by 259 people on Pinterest. Eddie: I meant, I haven't seen her today. Waldo: I got close once. Harriette Winslow: Oh lord. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: It was on his tongue! Steve Urkel: Oh, please, Laura. You're acting like animals! Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Hey, cut me some slack. Don't they teach Black History at your school? Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Harriette, stupid means good. At the airport he picked up 6 bags. Harriette Winslow: Abrasive? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Wrong, cummerbund breath. I want to know why my instructions were not followed. Steve Urkel: By any chance, is that something you enjoy? Laura: Well, he's all yours, Eddie. I offered you my heart and you stomped that sucker flat! Harriette Winslow: What's wrong with that? Steve Urkel: Oh, I'd better lock it then! [Eddie sits down and Carl grabs his hair]. Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: Bye. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [to Officer Wigglesworth as played by Carl] We're on the same side of the law. Nobody threatens my woman! Carl Otis Winslow: Harriette, I was steamed, I didn't want to do something I'll regret. Laura: Steve, did you eat that moldy cheese? Oh, you're a sore for sight eyes! Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Ooh, that's nice! Steve Urkel: [after discovering that the stereo in Eddie's car has had its serial number scratched off] Uh-uh. Carl Otis Winslow: Look at it again, Harriette. Did you see them work on Dora Fenswick? Didn't you? Laura: Science class. Dr. Goodrich: Ms. Crawford, I am a medical doctor, not a carnival act! Steven Quincy "Steve" Urkel. Why he showed great strength of character and what's his reward: you fire him. 1 The Shrink Machine Was Made To Make The Winslows Plenty Of Money. The '90s series "Family Matters" may have been about the Chicago-based Winslow family, but the show's breakout character was actually Winslow neighbor Steve Urkel. Chocum hi chip chok!". Waldo Faldo: Be careful he has another one. Steve Urkel: No, I don't like to disturb anyone. Dexter Thornhill: [after being found guilty at Urkel's trial] Darn you Urkel, Darn you to Heck! What's up? Carl Otis Winslow: Yes and that's not all. I'm going home! Just blacked out for a second there! Yesterday Richie and 3J were playing 'Nick and Carl'. Waldo: I can't talk to girls. Laura: You know, I just don't get why people are so afraid of our history. Rachel Crawford: Well, I'm planning dinner for a very, very special friend. [Laura has stuffed her bra with Eddie's socks], Steve Urkel: [entering] Hi gang! You're a fine man.You'll be spending the month of May in your room, but you're a fine young man. But, I'd be willing to pay you. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Would you shut your filthy mouth! Laura: She didn't need a hairstylist, she needs a fairy godmother! Carl Otis Winslow: Don't get cute with me Harriet. Steve Urkel: Oh great! Oh, gentle Romeo, if thou doth love, pronounce it faithfully. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Big Guy, what are you up? Carl Otis Winslow: What did she have to say? Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Fletcher has a bigger family then we thought. Quotes.net. Laura Lee Winslow: You couldn't check out a book? Never snort with a hangover! Harriette Winslow: [feigns being touched] Oh, Carl this is beautiful. The people that did this to us are teaching the same GARBAGE to their kids. And to top it all off you gave me an old card that I already have. Harriette Winslow: Carl I am not a weak, wimpy woman whose afraida to speak her mind. He's gonna drive us tonight. Weel Good Lord man, she's an overnight success story. I promised grandma I'd help her get ready. Oh my God! 8. Rachel Crawford: Steve!, Steve! Now, I'm gonna give you a compliment. "I heard you are looking for a stud. Can't see a darn thing. Eddie: No, Kyle's gone solo and Jerry went with him. Laura: I mean it, Waldo. Laura Lee Winslow: No it wasn't. It's a beautiful language. urkel-steve. Laura: Let's eat everything and see if he can take a joke! Waldo: We rented us a limo station wagon. I can't even tell her it won't ever happen again! Laura Lee Winslow: If you're really my guardian angel, where're your wings and your harp? I'm not your personal doormat. Edward! Trying to cover it up would only make it worse. [opens fire at Urkelbot who catches all the rounds in his hand], Urkelbot: [Urkelbot walks up to the robber and drops the bullets on the floor before lifting the robber off the floor with one hand], Urkelbot: [Terminator Impression] Hasta la vista, baby! Steve Urkel: Well, what if you trip or something? Laura: Sure. Steve Urkel: Practice. Steve Urkel: Well, if I did, nobody would ever let me in. But Waldo messed up and put the wrong date on the flyers. Suppose I made it happen. Carl: If that's the case then I plead guilty. Steve is embarrassed that he didn't walk out the door faster. He opted ofr early retirement. Steve who? Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: I was thinking you could help me during the test. It's late. I mean we've made contributions to this country for over 300 years, but you wouldn't know it looking at most history books, it's not fair. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Only when we kiss, Laura Lee, only when we kiss [they passionately kiss]. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: I couldn't even go in. And believe you me, I know what being different is all about. Ms. Steuben: No, I'm a nervous teacher! "Clean up your room, Edward." Stefan Urkelle: Wake me, shake me, break me, but baby, don't forsake me. Carl: Who are you and what have you done with our son? In the latter half of Family Matters, Steve started staying with the Winslows as his parents didn't want him around. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Laura this elixir will improve my coordination, my posture, my vocal intonation, and I might even sprout a chest hair or two. Carl: Harriette, there is a car in the living room! Nick Neidermeyer: Do I have to remind you who you're talking to? Steve Urkel: 'Standardized Urkel Elementary Math Exam'. What are you doing with these bells? My mom's the one who really messed up. I never got an 'A' before. This library card is proof that ONE person can make a difference. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Hey dad. Ms. Steuben: All right, class. If there was one thing I thought the show could have brushed up on, it would be the premise of the episodes. Willie Fuffner: But he wasn't, so chill out ok. Laura Lee Winslow: You just don't get it, do you. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Laura, I kept this ring in hopes that one day you would accept it. Steve Urkel: Uh-oh, Mr.Frostbite. Now can you give me one good reason why I shouldn't ground you for the rest of your life. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: DAN DRUFF? Waldo Faldo from Illinois. White, known for playing Steve Urkel on the 1990s sitcom "Family Matters," is. It seems the guy that you purchased your stereo equipment from didn't want you to fill in any important paper work. Carl Otis Winslow: [after being frightened by Pablo, the stick bug] Did you see the size of that thing? Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: What? [kisses Laura] Love you. Laura: Well you're stubborn, irritating, loud, obnoxious, pushy, clumsy Steve Urkel: Hi everybody! Steve Urkel: You yelled at me and you called me a butthead! Steve Urkel: From my stay-away fund. And it's all my fault. Harriette Winslow: What a miserable evening. All the doo da day. Steve Urkel: [Rushed] That's all. Steve Urkel: [while Laura and Maxine hit Steve with two Boston Cream Pies] No, AAH!, WAAAH! Just as I thought. You had an accident. Carl: Of all the names that I have called you , the one that bothers you is butthead? Laura: Well, that's because you have self-confidence. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: It was Jan Matzeliger, in 1883. [Notices Maxine & Laura left the living room] Well, I thought it was a good story. Carl Otis Winslow: [furious] Edward is in jail. Estelle Winslow: Carl! Sorry I'm late, but I got my tongue stuck in the printing press. Three times X equals six. You know, I was exposed to this sort of thing when I was growing up, but I always hoped it would be different for my kids. It's fascinating. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Why? Laura: Look, I owe you an apology. Laura: This is just a model, right? Waldo Geraldo Faldo: [reveals his empty jacket] He meant the booze that came out of my jacket. Carl: Steve, will you please stop sulking and come out of the bathroom? When you make a mistake, fess up to it. Waldo: Laura, I know I'm just wasting my time, but would you like to kinda, maybe go out with me, sorta, tomorrow night, maybe? Harriette: What's goin' on down here and why do I smell cinnamon flavored smoke? Harriette Winslow: No, you don't have to remind me of nothing. Needless to say she's not amused as he jumps on there]. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: What'cha gonna do, Willie? Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: The librarian, a white man that I'd known all my life, pushed me out into the street and told me never to come back. The valet gave me a tip. Rodney Beckett: YOU thought you were smart? Would you like that? It can't explode or anything? You ever been down to the slaughterhouse? It meant a lot to me. [Goes to feel his head]. Laura Lee Winslow: [in tears] Daddy, everything's a mess! Then there's in the summer, when we use him as a human bug zapper. Laura: Steve Urkel, you are the most annoying human being that I have ever met! Instead of cool, it was set on Nerd. Steve Urkel: No state your name not name your state. Harriette Winslow: [to Rachel] Believe me! I can teach you how to cook. Rodney Beckett: [after seeing Eddie's music video] I can't believe it. Harriette Winslow: [while trying to calm an apprehensive Rachel about leaving Richie overnight with the babysitter for the first time] Rachel, I know it's hard leaving your baby for the first time, but after that it gets a lot easier. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: We took in $2,000 dad and we want you to have it. Hey, what were you doing in my closet? Waldo Geraldo Faldo: O.k., but I'm not Home. She just slipped and I caught her. https://www.quotes.net/movies/family_matters_102099, https://www.quotes.net/movies/family_matters_quotes_102099. I can't live like this. Rodney Beckett: I'm Rodney, but my friends call me Rod-meister. I promise, okay? Eddie Winslow, front and center! We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. [poins to the part on Harriette's diary] Aha, it's over with me and Raoul. Right now we're going to have a wedding, but directly after that we're going to have a funeral. Our limo awaits. Overall, Steve's good intentions trump his flaws and give the audience a plethora of laughs every time he comes onscreen and says, "Did I do that?" Without Steve Urkel, Family Matters would have been overlooked as just another TGIF Friday night comedy show. Rachel Crawford: Uh, Steve, would you mind coming over to the restaurant on Sunday at about 7:30? Steve Urkel: King me. Steve Urkel: [Talking to Eddie and his girlfriend] You heard her, you're all witnesses. "What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? Harriette you're the one who said you're fat. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Yeah, well you have to get rid of them. [Comes in the lving room with Mother Winslow as Eddie is taking his frustrations out on his sack of dirty laundry because Carl has just taken Waldo to the Chicago Bulls game instead of him]. Lionel: Really? Jaleel White, the actor best known for playing Steve Urkel on the 1990s sitcom Family Matters, has launched his own cannabis brand - on the day enthusiasts around the globe enjoy a toke. Well, he got it trapped in the rear door of a Buick and was dragged eight and a half blocks. Your father waited at the Box Office for an hour. Harriette: That won't get the stains out. "Tomorrow, Dad!" Steven Quincy Urkel: Look, you've got this big bed. Laura Lee Winslow: Aunt Rachel, take little Richie, the Murphy twins are giving each other haircuts in the backyard! Harriette Winslow: For my birthday, you bought me an exercise trampoline. Steve Urkel: Now that Waldo's out of the picture, does that make me your number one reject? Stefan Urkelle: [Fed up with Carl Urkel annoying him constantly] That's it, go home! Carl: Oh, you heard me, don't ever come back. Laura: No! Laura Lee Winslow: He didn't need to. The Nineties. And I'll be coming home tomorrow. Carl Otis Winslow: No. He's usually knee deep in dead mosquitoes. ", Harriette Winslow: She looked at me with tears in her eyes, and she said "Why, Mom?". Steve Urkel: [sobbing] In about a week or so, but she gonna have to miss the prom. To rob and murder? Harriette Winslow: Carl, I'm up in Laura's room and she looks at me, and she asks 'Why, Mom? You're late for class. I know how you feel about Laura. Laura Lee Winslow: Tonight is the charity bachelor auction. Aunt Oona: The gas pipe broke when my living room flooded. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Oh, cool. Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: That's big talk coming from a guy in Italy. [plugs the cord into the socket]. I'm getting penalized because I'm emotionally stable! You're making me blush. Laura: Is it my imagination or is your voice lower? Weasel: [Eddie leaves and Weasel gets hit by Waldo] What was that for? Steve Urkel: Why, to make everyone think that the woman I love actually loves me back? Dont you know when you make a mistake, you fess up to it. I'd lay one on you that would weld your glasses to your face. Here's What Steve Urkel Looks Like Today. I mean the guy's a feeb. In Season 1 he was a supporting character and made his first appearance as a background character in Rachel's First Date and had his first major role in "Laura's First Date", however as of Season 2 he was officially considered a main character . Was I about to take the Big Sleep? Harriette Winslow: I am not! Carl enters her room with Eddie, who is struggling to stifle his laughter.]. People stopped and starred, called me names, and some even spit at me. Carl Otis Winslow: Well I talked to your boy Squeeze and he won't be bothering you for a long time. He doesn't have the advantages to see how good the cops are like our kids have. We'll start with a common Korean phrase. Robber: [holding up the convenience store where Carl, Steve, and Urkelbot are undercover, threatening Carl with a gun] You! So they picked up all out stuff and moved us again. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: March 10, Went to the market. You're grounded for two weeks and you are to stay away from my car until it learns self-defense. So, is it all right with you? Steve Urkel: Did I mention my dad knows Wayne Newton? You've been saying it for weeks. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Allison, is that true? Carl Otis Winslow: Now honey, it's really ok Harriette Winslow: No it's not ok, Carl. Carl Otis Winslow: [More excitedly] Yes, ma'am! Carl Otis Winslow: Oh gee that'd scare me. You know that in Kenya, "Urkel" means "a benign cyst on the foreleg of a wildebeest"? Look, Steve. Steve Urkel: But, I've been practicing and my progress is impressive, even if I do say so myself. How much will that cost me? You made me so nervous that I had to go to the hospital to get the thimble taken off. Carl Otis Winslow: That a girl, Harriette. But you'll never play in this game again. Harriette Winslow: These flowers are not fresh. Harriette Winslow: Carl was nice enough to invite you into his game and you've been acting like a jackass. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Chuck is twice the man Raoul is. Rachel Crawford: Maybe you could come back when your voice has changed. Allison: Look, we're just having a little harmless fun. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [shocked] And he brought hooters! Carl Otis Winslow: [to the racist cop who pulled Eddie over] You know, I don't know how that badge stays up, because it's pinned to sludge. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: I'll show him. [He and his partner grabs Willie and Waldo]. I'm in this class. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Yes, those were very confusing times. Clarence: Dude, you a serious little nerd. Third, if you touch me at any time, the "non-date" is over. I'm cooking breakfast. Willie Fuffner: [Wipes his own mouth] Thank you. And instead of admitting to it, you got yourself involved in gambling. Laura Lee Winslow: [after Steve gives her a ring] This is real! Baby Girl: You couldn't push me out of this park if you wanted to! If you hit me, do I not sneeze?
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